Partner Assisted Lucidity Technique


This technique as the name suggests, requires the help and assistance of a partner. So unlike most, or nearly all of the other techniques, this can restrict its usage and where and when it can be performed. The main advantage from using the Partner Assisted Lucidity Technique is that not only is it a highly effective way of becoming lucid, but it can be fun as well. Another bonus of carrying out this technique is that you can learn a lot about your own sleeping habits as well as observing your partners. Not only can this give you a greater understanding of each other nocturnal activities, but may also help bring the relationship closer together.

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Now one of the main criteria for this process to be effective is that you need to have a common interest in lucid dreaming. With someone observing your movements throughout the night it can be the ideal time to experiment with processes and interventions which could improve, not only your dream recall, but your ability to become lucid more often.

“You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us. And the world will live as one.” John Lennon

Your Very Own Sleep Lab

Now my wife’s interest in lucid dreaming is minimal, so my own experience with this technique is only on a theoretical level and while researching, I was unable to find many articles on the process itself. This seems a little confusing as it seems obvious that having your own sleep lab, would indeed be a highly effective way of improving your capacity to become lucid more often. So if your partner or a very close friend should show the slightest interest in the subject, try it out. It may be the best technique available today. And if not you will have a lot of fun along the way. This technique as the name suggests, requires the help and assistance of a partner. So unlike most, or nearly all of the other techniques, this can restrict its usage and where and when it can be performed. The Partner Assisted Lucidity Technique is taken from Daniel Love’s book ‘Are You Dreaming’ which is available to buy HERE.

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The Partner Assisted Lucidity Technique Process

Daytime Preparation – You must both decide on a phrase or cue word that you will each mention to each other throughout the day. When you hear this phrase or cue, you will then perform a reality test. This cue doesn’t need to be too elaborate or complicated. It could be the tried and tested ‘Are you dreaming?’ or it could become your own private game that only you know about. To play the game you can drop the phrase or cue word into your daily conversation and try to catch out your partner. You could then keep score and the loser suffers a forfeit, such as they have to act as the ‘observer’ while you sleep.

Night-time Step 1 – The ideal time to try out this technique is to choose a day when you are not in too much of a rush and you can wake up early. Weekends or a holiday are best. You need to carry out the Wake Back To Bed procedure and get up after around 4 or 5 hours of sleep. Once you have been awake for around 30 to 60 minutes and your mental alertness has increased, you must then return to bed.

Night-time Step 2 – You should have by now chosen which one of you is to observe and which one of you will get the pleasure of falling back to sleep. This role will be reversed upon the next attempt so don’t worry if you are carrying out a forfeit. The observer will sit by the bed in such a way not to cause any disturbance to the one sleeping. The sleeper should try to sleep on their back so the observer can see their face and detect when REM is taking place.

1 5 Partner Assisted Lucidity Technique

Night-time Step 3 – The sleeper then falls back to sleep while the observer waits patiently and silently for the sleeper to show the signs of Rapid Eye Movement (see Stages Of Sleep) that indicates that he is indeed dreaming.

Night-time Step 4 – Once the person observing recognizes the onset of REM they must then signal the sleeper. This can be done by whispering ‘You’re Dreaming…..’ or ‘Are you dreaming?….’ at regular intervals. Should your prompting cause them to stir, become still and silent, until they drift back to sleep. You can then start the process again.

Night-time Step 5 – Once you become aware that the period of REM has ended you need to gently wake them up. The best way to do this is to repeat the phrase ‘(NAME) you can wake up now….what were you dreaming?’ Start of in a whisper and gradually increase the volume until they wake up.

Night-time Step 6 – Chat about the results of the experiment and remember to record all the details in their dream journal. And if you have enough free time you can swap places and repeat the procedure once more.

“I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart for so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams, we can be together all the time.” A A Milne

This process can be adapted in many ways. You can add many variations to the steps and experiment with various cues and phrase. Another idea is the observer can video the sleeper, everyones got a phone, right? Not only is this a great way of keeping a track of the process used, but it also gives them a wonderful insight into how they fall asleep.


Set Up A Signal

As carried out in sleep laboratories around the world, you can even come up with a predetermined eye movement signal ( this can be practiced out of sleep with eyes closed, so they know what to look out for) that can let the observer know that the subject has indeed become lucid and no longer needs the cue phrase.

The possibilities are endless with this technique. Have fun and experiment with different phrases, a flashing touch or red light when REM is detected. Smells such as perfume will also work well. In fact anything you fancy can be the difference between just dreaming and entering the amazing world of lucidity.

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